Nobody Knows

Ought to post this shit on that other blog, but nobody reads that so I'll post here, among "friends"...

Had my first meeting with my Paramount contact this morning. We went back and forth on story ideas and it went really well, I think. Meeting again tomorrow to keep it going. I was nervous going in, but he really loves my writing and we're both just trying to do what's best for the adaptation.

Also just got a call from my lawyer and I'm told we're "really close" now. Ha ha. One somewhat significant sticking point remains to be cleared up, but I think we should be able to sort it out.

Bit of a relief it's all finally falling into place. I feel like I've been living on a promise since August. I've shared the good news, I've collected my pats on the back, but now it's time for the pay-off.

A few years on, I'll look back on this and understand how I could've done everything differently. Who knows what can happen. I was thinking today, the biggest thing this has given me has been a much-needed boost to this theoretical career of mine...

SPF and now Paramount. I mean, I have done a god-awful job of trying to get my creative career off the ground since I graduated from college. Seriously. As nice as it is that I "never gave up", there's a lot of shit I never did over the years. Grants and fellowships and festivals and contests I never applied to. I have done a piss-poor job of getting my work out there. And I've nobody to blame but myself for that. (Hand me the cat o' nine tails...)

Which makes it even crazier that one of the few things I did manage to apply to actually accepted me, and ended up giving my career this new life. I guess I feel a little guilty because I know that there are so many writers out there that apply to everything they can. People who ARE good at getting their work out there. Who do I think I am?

But I'm not taking any of this for granted. And maybe I just needed this boost more than those people, to keep going. On several levels. This is my handicap. This is going to help me keep writing.

I'll buy that for a dollar!!!