Say Hello to My Little Friend

As I stepped onto the Paramount lot for the first time, I kept my eye out for any celebrities...

I turn a blind corner and who do I run into...?
MOTHERFUCKIN' BUMBLEBEE!

Large as goddamn life.

I swear, it was like that episode of Diff'rent Strokes where Sam and Arnold accidentally wander onto the set of Knight Rider and almost get blown to child-actor smithereens. (Yes, it saddens me that a certain percentage of my pittance of a readership are too young to get this reference.)

"Hey, Malice," bellowed Bumblebee. "Need a lift???"

"Nah thanks, Bumble, I got a meeting," said Malice. "Which way's the Admin Building?"

"Thatta way!"

"Oh hey, can I take a picture of you with my cell phone and blog about you?"

"Only if you make believe we had this conversation, Malice!"

"You got yourself a deal, Bumble!!!"

For those who prefer flesh and blood celeb sightings, here's "E" from Entourage, signing some autographs outside my hotel right before heading into some exclusive private party.
The coolest guys don't tuck their shirts in.

Thursday. I had the best Thursday. I can't even go into specifics, but the meeting went so well. The producers really responded to the material. At one point, one of the producers asked me, "What did you do before this? What was your day job?"

He asked this with a smirk on his face, as if he'd just set me up to deliver a killer punchline. Asked this as if it were a foregone conclusion that I would never have to do that thing ever again. Asked this as if he were the captain of a ship that had just rescued me from some lonely desert island, and the question were really, "What were you doing to survive for the past 10 years before we found you?"

I'd never developed a coherent explanation of what I did for 6 years of my adult life, to make ends meet. Sheepishly, I explained, "I worked for [BLANKETY-BLANK], making slideshows and pitchbooks for I-bankers."

5 sets of blank stares. "Well, you won't need to do that again."

And just like that, my greatest fear dispelled.

Had a great meeting with a manager in the afternoon. Really seemed to click. I wasn't even planning on taking any meetings like that on this trip, but this turned out to be a nice surprise. Still too early to say, but it was very encouraging.

Later on, I met up with the infamous 6mx, who roped in her friend April to help babysit me through another night in this strange and fascinating city.

I don't want to be rash. I know that my view of this city is colored by the good things that are happening for me here and now, and the Bumblebees are going to my head... but I could imagine living here. I think I really could live in L.A. In my heart, I know that New York never fucking loved me. And I'm not saying that L.A. loves me, but she really seems to listen to me, you know? And even if she's just pretending, well maybe that's better than nothing...

"Don't you think that you need somebody? Don't you think that you need someone?" needled the Patriotic Gay Horse. "Everybody needs somebody. You're not the only one."

THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF THE END SHUFFLED-5:
1. "Darkly Dreaming Dexter: Chapter 1", (audiobook)
2. "I Love You Mary Jane", Cypress Hill/Sonic Youth
3. "Tongue", R.E.M.
4. "Eminence Front", The Who
5. "Double Pump", Girl Talk
I Am Trying to Believe BONUS:
"Count On My Love", Liz Phair