Dear Children of the Revolution:

I was reading an article in Time Magazine about Robo-Rats. Scientists managed to hook up tiny computers directly into rat brains and thereby control the movements of the rats.

I think this part-rat/part-machine idea is a tremendous new trend. I can't wait to have my apartment infested with bionic rats. Because I think that we can trust that vermin would use their new superpowers responsibly. And I'm all for giving our evolutionary successors a little boost. Our kind have dominated this planet for long enough, I say. Let's create some cockroaches with nuclear-capabilities while we're at it. And mosquitos with tiny, sawed-off shotguns.

Off the topic completely, I'm off to Chicago this weekend to attend my sister's wedding. If you need to reach me, you can call my new cell phone: (212) 479-7990.

I have to give a toast at the wedding. I'm going to have to think something up on the plane...