Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Nightmare Shore

This is officially a recurring nightmare for me. First time I've had it here in The Tomb.

In the dream, I'm in my current apartment. I see my childhood dog walking around.

It occurs to me that I don't remember the last time I walked him.

I don't recall ever walking him up or down the steps that lead up to my current apartment.

What has he been doing? Shitting in the cat box? What has he been living off of?

A rash of guilt and concern... followed by the realization that he died years ago. I had him put to sleep after an extended bout with cancer. I watched him die. Witnessed his last breath.

What does this mean? A deep concern that there's something that I'm neglecting to do. The fear that something I'm failing to do right now is going to come back to haunt me.

Another nightmare I had over the weekend:

I was stuck in THE JERSEY SHORE. I'd been dumped into the cast, forced to live in that house, and all the cast members were treating me like shit.

Where was my head this weekend?

You know what I'd like? Some peace of mind. Maybe for a few days. Maybe a whole week.

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2 Comments:

Anonymous fedup said...

I dreamt one time I was trying to console (if you know what I'm sayin') Sammy after she had a fight with Ronnie...

3/23/2011 08:45:00 AM  
Blogger Raed Moustafa said...

I think that you haven't faced the obviouss: CANCCER killed him - not youu, "genius." (Congratulations for seeking his best end-of-life-care as most appropriate; that COULD HAVE been the, "nightmare," you are/having referenced. (Not easy seeing/witnessing life go; I have been there). Walking with* him.

11/20/2022 09:00:00 PM  

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