silent night, deadly night

this is the countdown week. countdown to the unhappiest christmas of my life. even if it goes well, it'll hurt like hell. it hurts just imagining it. a reopening of wounds. they never cease to bleed...

forgot my ipod at home today. i've got to make it through 8 more hours listening to office chatter and footsteps.

my insides feel stale. perhaps i'm dying.