Knick Overdrive

Adverts for Steven Soderbergh's new CINEMAX show "THE KNICK" have been popping up all over this blessed city.

It is odd when something you've worked on—even in a completely non-creative capacity—starts entering the world. There is a peculiar sense of ownership, at least for me. That goddamn show helped me pay my goddamn bills for SE7EN GODDAMN MONTHS. It's difficult to not feel some connection, even when all you've done is helped process all its fucking invoices. Jesus, Mary and Joseph — but there were sooo many invoices!

I shot and directed a short film today. I wrote and shot and directed a short film today. I don't know how it's going to end up... but I kinda loved it. I love directing actors. I love breaking down a scene, exploring it, picking it apart, making different choices. I love the way a beautiful actress's face can fill a screen with light. This model/actress came out of nowhere and agreed to be in this short film, working with two guys she'd never met before. She was OUTSTANDING. So easy to work with, completely engaged in the process, just breathtaking on camera.

I'm blathering on too much about a short that I'm, perhaps, building up too much.

I just... miss doing these things. Working with an old friend and with this actress, it just reminded me how much I love filmmaking. How much I love directing.

Steven Soderbergh said this thing in an interview many years ago. I'm paraphrasing, but he advised aspiring filmmakers to skip film school -- to use the money they'd use for film school to MAKE A FILM. That advice has haunted me over the years. I remain critical of that advice for many reasons. And yet the underlying idea haunts me to this day...

How many times and how many WAYS can you "GO FOR BROKE"?

In some ways, I feel like I *have* gone for broke... LITERALLY... but in other ways, I feel like maybe I've never gone all the way...