Rollie Egg Crackers

A friend got me a Rollie Eggmaster as a gag birthday gift.

This is my attempt to make one of the recipes from the Rollie cookbook, "Egg Crackers".

Large egg...

Crumbled crackers...

Shredded cheese...

Dump it all into a heated Rollie, slick with cooking spray...

Unexpectedly... the Rollie rises... a LOT...

The egg abomination overflowed during cooking...

The tumescent egg phallus flopped over and squirted out yellow spunk as if it were an exhausted pornstar, wearily dropping a salmonella load. Yum!

Worst hangover food ever: warm omelet cock.

It doesn't slide out of the device too easily, so you're forced to dig around and fish out these penis-shaped hunks of egg. (Ultimately, I could have cooked this in a small pan and cleaned up in a fraction of the time it took using the Rollie -- but what fun would that be?)