Tears of Unfathomable Sadness

["Scott Tenorman Must Die", episode 65 of SOUTH PARK, Season 5. No spoilers here. Just find it and watch it. It's not even the funniest episode. But the ending's a scream.]

These Sunday nights.

Thinking about the call I'll get tomorrow, from the West Coast. To hear what the suits think of the latest draft I've turned in.

I like this script I've written. I think it stands on its own. Separate from the play. I think it has a life of its own. A unique voice. No matter what happens tomorrow, I'm proud of the work I've done to this point.

I think what makes me a bit woozy to think about is what a gamble I've taken to try to do this full-time. It's like I quit my day job to become a full-time gambler. The future is not guaranteed.

I've always played it safe. I know I needed to make this leap of faith.

It's been about 8 months since I walked away from the regular paycheck. The only way I've managed to avoid a nervous breakdown has been to not think about it too much.

I'm accustomed to regular day jobs where you go in every day and, unless you really fuck up or there's some bad turn in the business, you've got the job as long as you can stomach it.

Now, I need to get attached to projects. And honestly, I haven't ruled out relocating to the West Coast if/when I feel like I just need to, to get further.

All right. Well, I'll see what the West Coast has to say to me tomorrow...