the death of the party

i don't normally do reviews of things on this page; there are plenty of other pages where you can read reviews. but in a little over two weeks, i've just powered through 5 seasons of "Six Feet Under", having just watched the final episode yesterday. i'm demolished. one day, i'd like to create something that will affect people as much as this show affected me. considering that i've essentially been in a state of grieving for over a year, the 63 episodes of this series really tapped something volatile in me. and unlike many shows that i've been impressed by but end in a clumsy manner, the ending of this show was, imho, pitch perfect. i am in awe. i am in envy.

i am completely fucking depressed.

there are a few months left in this turbulent year. the days are undoubtedly getting shorter. and there's so much i've got to do and get resolved. so much unresolved and bitter and messy and unfortunate. i'm desperately trying to refocus myself so that i can make it through without getting buried. last winter was cold. this could be colder.