The Tomb is in the Heart

It's Wednesday night, O My Brothers, which of course means that I'm writing Friday's blog entry. My entire world could change on Thursday... but I'm placing my chips on stasis.

All the time and effort I put into this sorry blog and it's still so woefully kept! I was in a photo shoot for a textbook last Saturday—that would've been perfect fodder for a blog entry! A personal anecdote, a uniquely curious scenario. What sort of textbook was it? Why was I part of it? What was I doing in the photos?

But no, I couldn't commit the energy to write about it. Instead, I wrote a half-assed entry about IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA. And composed a really long entry about why people shouldn't buy a 1st generation 3D TV. Hard-hitting stories that matter to people. Could this blog be any more random?

It's Wednesday night as I write this and the week's already gone to hell. Pitched my take on a project to New Line over a conference call, which ended up being one of the most awkward, excruciating (professional) experiences I've had. It's like delivering an audition over the phone. Did all this prep, had the story cleanly laid out before me—presented a fairly articulate take, breaking down the tone and the scope and the characters and structure. And then I get...

... dead silence...

... interrupted by the voice of a producer. "Uh... I'm confused about something..."

That's where the oral exam began. Poking holes in the narrative logic, getting clarification on certain points. It's to be expected, part of this process. I was prepared for most of their questions. But these people couldn't have sounded less interested in any of it.

"Well," one of the producers said toward the end, "we've heard a few takes from different writers so far and... no one's gone in the direction that you're going in..." As if that should've been some consolation prize to me.

I hate pitching. I hate jumping through hoops to land a shitty, low-paying Open Writing Assignment.

Imagine a career path that required you to go on an endless succession of job interviews every year for the rest of your life...

I need to change some things. I know what I want. I know what I'm capable of.